Not Ironic

It’s like rain on your weddin’ day
It’s a free ride when you’ve already paid
It’s the good advice that you just didn’t take
And who would’ve thought, it figures
– Alanis Morissette, Ironic

I’ve had Alanis Morissette’s heavily criticised song stuck in my head for the past couple of weeks because, as you might have guessed, the forecast for our wedding is looking quite wet. I don’t really care all that much if it does rain, except I’m worried that some people may drive while a little more intoxicated than they should, and the low visibility will not make for a safe drive home.

In a lot of crime shows, characters related to the victim often say things like, “If only I hadn’t stayed late at the office, then maybe she wouldn’t be dead right now.” And the member of law enforcement will reassure them that it wasn’t their fault, it was the fault of the person who killed them. But I’m kinda with the victim on this one. If you think about the whole chaos theory, butterfly effect thing, perhaps if you had caught an earlier train home, then the killer might have moved on to a different target due to the lack of opportunity. So I can understand the victim’s thought process.

I feel like there are many times in my life where I can pinpoint where one bad decision has lead to a negative result. When MrMan5.5 and I were flying back from South Australia, we stopped to get Hungry Jacks at the airport because I just had to have something to eat, even though the flight wasn’t very long, and I wasn’t all that hungry. Just before our plane was due to land, that lovely Hungry Jacks meal made it into one of the airplane vomit bags, only there was so much vomit that the bag split at the bottom and spilled all over my shoes. As MrMan5.5 and I dealt with the mess, we forgot that we had left our PSP and Nintendo DS in the seat pocket of the seats in front of us. When we finally made it off the plane, they were the last things on our mind, and by the time we realised, they were on a trip to Queensland. The airport staff put in a missing items record, but we never heard back about our consoles.

That whole experience we’ve blamed on my unnecessary Hungry Jacks. If I hadn’t eaten, then I wouldn’t have thrown up so much food, which wouldn’t have spilled all over my shoes, etc. We’re now at the point where before flying, MrMan5.5 asks me whether I’m absolutely sure that I want to be eating before we hop on the plane. Nothing has been left behind since.

The reason why I’m writing all of this is that I keep having this feeling that someone isn’t going to make it home safely on the night of our wedding. And I know a lot of people will tell me that it’s not my fault, but if I hadn’t chosen to get married, and at that particular venue, then perhaps they wouldn’t have wrapped their car around a tree. Who knows? Special K says that I’m being silly, and maybe I am, but this is just my neurotic nature! I really want to have a fleet of taxis on hand just in case some people make some bad decisions, but I imagine a lot of people will turn them down as they won’t want to have to take another taxi in order to pick up their car the next day. Attending weddings is already incredibly expensive!

Let’s just hope it dries up in the evening.

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One Response to Not Ironic

  1. Michael Bell says:

    I think the problem with this mode of thinking is it tends to recognise negative events moreso. While it possible that someone may be injured/hurt because your wedding happened to occur in such a way they ended up at the wrong place and the wrong time, BUT it seems to me just as likely that the plans they might have made were it not for your wedding would have the same chance of putting them somewhere at the wrong place and wrong time. It is easy to see the causality when something bad happens. But you never see the causality that you stopped them from being mugged on the street, or breaking an arm cleaning the gutter.

    (The other viewpoint of things being fated, means that whether or not you invited something would have happened.)

    Anyway unless you are capable of knowing the result of each decision beforehand I don’t think is a feasible way to judge how the way you interact with other people affects them.

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